Name Calling and Thunderstorms
Yesterday, Talia was using Aaron's Magnadoodle and, according to him, would not let him use it. I asked Talia to finish up what she was doing, and to please let Aaron use his own toy (she has her own, as well).
A few minutes later, I was in the kitchen, feeding Melina, when Talia walks in with a sullen look on her face. She looks up at me and says, "Mom, Aaron called me bad poo-poo."
I have to tell you, I really tried not to laugh. REALLY. But when the fatigue level is at the maximum, Aaron could have simply called her by her name, and I might have laughed. I know that laughing was the not the appropriate response, and Talia knew it, too. Her face fell, and she started to tear up.
I spoke very quietly to her and explained that, while Aaron should not have said that to her, I was very tired, and just about anything would make me laugh. I told her that I understood she felt bad by what he said, and that I wasn't laughing at how she felt. It was a moment where I appreciated the fact that Talia is seven and that we can have real conversations about feelings, about what is right and wrong, and what is not too bad. "And," I added, "What he said is kind of funny when you think about it, isn't it?" Talia agreed that Aaron's choice of words was sort of funny, and she laughed, too. I told her I'd speak to Aaron as soon as I could.
I called to Aaron, asking him to come into the kitchen. He made it about halfway, into the foyer, before he said, "I said it to the couch." The kid knew what I had been going to say, and already had an excuse in hand. Nice try, wise guy! By the time I got him into the kitchen, he'd admitted to using those words against Talia and that it probably wasn't the best choice he made. He agreed to apologize to her for saying something that wasn't nice. His only problem -- he didn't know which twin was Talia!
****
In the wee hours of this early morning, we had a brief thunderstorm. Aaron usually isn't a fan of storms, and sometimes wakes up and wants someone with him. I heard the thunder, and figured I'd send Tim into Aaron's room to get into bed as a precaution.
As it turns out, Aaron never even heard the thunder. When I asked him about the storm, he said he didn't know there was one. I told him that Daddy had gone in to sleep with him in case he had been frightened by the storm. He looked at me and said, "Oh. I thought Daddy was in my bed because he loves me."
How sweet is that?
A few minutes later, I was in the kitchen, feeding Melina, when Talia walks in with a sullen look on her face. She looks up at me and says, "Mom, Aaron called me bad poo-poo."
I have to tell you, I really tried not to laugh. REALLY. But when the fatigue level is at the maximum, Aaron could have simply called her by her name, and I might have laughed. I know that laughing was the not the appropriate response, and Talia knew it, too. Her face fell, and she started to tear up.
I spoke very quietly to her and explained that, while Aaron should not have said that to her, I was very tired, and just about anything would make me laugh. I told her that I understood she felt bad by what he said, and that I wasn't laughing at how she felt. It was a moment where I appreciated the fact that Talia is seven and that we can have real conversations about feelings, about what is right and wrong, and what is not too bad. "And," I added, "What he said is kind of funny when you think about it, isn't it?" Talia agreed that Aaron's choice of words was sort of funny, and she laughed, too. I told her I'd speak to Aaron as soon as I could.
I called to Aaron, asking him to come into the kitchen. He made it about halfway, into the foyer, before he said, "I said it to the couch." The kid knew what I had been going to say, and already had an excuse in hand. Nice try, wise guy! By the time I got him into the kitchen, he'd admitted to using those words against Talia and that it probably wasn't the best choice he made. He agreed to apologize to her for saying something that wasn't nice. His only problem -- he didn't know which twin was Talia!
****
In the wee hours of this early morning, we had a brief thunderstorm. Aaron usually isn't a fan of storms, and sometimes wakes up and wants someone with him. I heard the thunder, and figured I'd send Tim into Aaron's room to get into bed as a precaution.
As it turns out, Aaron never even heard the thunder. When I asked him about the storm, he said he didn't know there was one. I told him that Daddy had gone in to sleep with him in case he had been frightened by the storm. He looked at me and said, "Oh. I thought Daddy was in my bed because he loves me."
How sweet is that?
Comments
When I taught and the kids would call each other names, sometimes I would ask them, "Do you think you're a bad poo poo (or whatever)?" And they would usually laugh and say no.
OF COURSE I tried to teach them not to call each other names, but I found that it's an equally good lesson to learn to let those type of comments slide off your back and move on!
BTW, I would have laughed too.