Out of the Closet
Hello. My name is Chris. I have a soon-to-be 28 month old, and I still breast feed her.
Phew! That was hard work, but the news is out. For some of you, this isn't news at all. For others, it might be, and you might be asking, "Why is this lady posting this? Isn't that under the category of TMI?" Well, yes and no. I am posting just so people like me understand that there are people like them out there.
Did I think that I'd be nursing my 2 year old child? No, not in a million years. My plans were to go 12 months, then 15. The kid NEVER took a bottle, so just to keep peace in the house, I then said that 18 months was a good cutoff. That time came and went, and 2 years seemed like a good age to wean her...over the summer, to heck with sleep routines. However, I needed to sleep. And that, my friend, is the underlying issue here. I sleep better when said child sleeps better, and therefore, we still nurse. Lesson #1: SLEEP IS NOT OVERRATED. Parents -- you know this already, right? And don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
I met a lady at the pool this summer who had delivered her 3rd child 4 weeks prior. At some point, we started talking about nursing, and she asked how long I had nursed Melina. She must have seen the hesitation...she looked a little scared and inquired, "Oh, you are still nursing her then?" Luckily, she was brought up properly and didn't scowl or jump back in disgust. In fact, she didn't seem judgmental at all. She actually said she understood, and had hoped to nurse her first two longer than she did, but with both children, latching on was difficult. Because I was brought up properly, I did not launch into a tirade on how she could have sought help with the latch-on, since breast milk really is the best for the baby. Maybe there were other issues. Maybe she preferred to bottle-feed. In my mind, it was her choice. She and I clearly both agree to Lesson #2: DO NOT JUDGE UNTIL YOU HAVE WALKED IN MY SHOES.
Obviously, since I am posting this topic, I have some opinions on it. But to be truthful, I go back and forth each day on whether or not I am doing the right thing. Melina is a happy, healthy child, and isn't that the goal? She doesn't take a pacifier (unless she is pretending to be a baby), and many kids her age still use those. She won't suck her thumb, either -- another habit that many children take well into adolescence (including my other kids!).
In early September, I went to the gynecologist for my annual check-up and was discussing breastfeeding with the doctor. He is probably in his mid-fifites to early sixties, and while I absolutely love his view on pre-natal care and delivery, I was not sure of his outlook on extended breastfeeding. He sort of laughed at me when I sheepishly told him I was still nursing Melina. He laughed, not because I was still doing it, but because of how I said it. His response after that? "Well," he continued. "I can almost guarantee you won't be sending her to college still on the boob." As I said, I really like this man!
Phew! That was hard work, but the news is out. For some of you, this isn't news at all. For others, it might be, and you might be asking, "Why is this lady posting this? Isn't that under the category of TMI?" Well, yes and no. I am posting just so people like me understand that there are people like them out there.
Did I think that I'd be nursing my 2 year old child? No, not in a million years. My plans were to go 12 months, then 15. The kid NEVER took a bottle, so just to keep peace in the house, I then said that 18 months was a good cutoff. That time came and went, and 2 years seemed like a good age to wean her...over the summer, to heck with sleep routines. However, I needed to sleep. And that, my friend, is the underlying issue here. I sleep better when said child sleeps better, and therefore, we still nurse. Lesson #1: SLEEP IS NOT OVERRATED. Parents -- you know this already, right? And don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
I met a lady at the pool this summer who had delivered her 3rd child 4 weeks prior. At some point, we started talking about nursing, and she asked how long I had nursed Melina. She must have seen the hesitation...she looked a little scared and inquired, "Oh, you are still nursing her then?" Luckily, she was brought up properly and didn't scowl or jump back in disgust. In fact, she didn't seem judgmental at all. She actually said she understood, and had hoped to nurse her first two longer than she did, but with both children, latching on was difficult. Because I was brought up properly, I did not launch into a tirade on how she could have sought help with the latch-on, since breast milk really is the best for the baby. Maybe there were other issues. Maybe she preferred to bottle-feed. In my mind, it was her choice. She and I clearly both agree to Lesson #2: DO NOT JUDGE UNTIL YOU HAVE WALKED IN MY SHOES.
Obviously, since I am posting this topic, I have some opinions on it. But to be truthful, I go back and forth each day on whether or not I am doing the right thing. Melina is a happy, healthy child, and isn't that the goal? She doesn't take a pacifier (unless she is pretending to be a baby), and many kids her age still use those. She won't suck her thumb, either -- another habit that many children take well into adolescence (including my other kids!).
In early September, I went to the gynecologist for my annual check-up and was discussing breastfeeding with the doctor. He is probably in his mid-fifites to early sixties, and while I absolutely love his view on pre-natal care and delivery, I was not sure of his outlook on extended breastfeeding. He sort of laughed at me when I sheepishly told him I was still nursing Melina. He laughed, not because I was still doing it, but because of how I said it. His response after that? "Well," he continued. "I can almost guarantee you won't be sending her to college still on the boob." As I said, I really like this man!
Comments
We co-slept with both of ours (which, in some circles, is a huge no-no) because we all got more sleep that way. Lack of sleep makes you crazy! Sleep is a huge motivator! I would have breast fed until whenever but that was not to be for me. We started out great but somewhere around month 4 for both kids my hormones whacked out and my milk production dropped drastically. Consultants from whom I had asked for help finally shrugged their shoulders and that was it. O had lost an alarming amount of weight and had to be put on formula before he suffered. It was horrible for me. I had already had the opposite birth experience from what I had planned (c-section) so that was a second blow.
Yep, for sure, never judge until you walk in someone's shoes. I admire you. You are doing what is right for both of you. Keep up the good work!