We arrived back on a Tuesday afternoon, after having made incredible time. What more could I ask for? How about a mowed lawn? Pulled weeds? A vacuumed house? Clean laundry? Yes, that is what Tim would have encountered had he taken the kids for that period of time. I'd have even gone to the grocery store, stocked up on fresh fruits, veggies, and snacks, and had dinner waiting for them. Alas, that's not what happened.
Below, I give you snippets from a real life conversation. Please, whatever you do, don't laugh.
Me: You know the lawn needs mowing. I thought you were going to do it.I went into the kitchen and start putting things away from our snack bag. I open the refrigerator and see the milk, which will now have spoiled, and the veggies that are long past their prime.
Tim: Yeah, but it started to rain, and then I didn't do it.
Me: That part was obvious. [And you were here for 4 nights, 5 days by yourself. It couldn't possibly have rained the whole time.]
Tim: Yeah, well...
Me: And the weeds? I asked you to pull up the weeds just in front of the house. It would have taken 15 minutes.
Me: You know, we need to get milk. I asked you to make sure there was milk in the fridge when we got back.I have to say, I didn't give him much of a chance to explain. Why? Because there was no explanation that could even come close to making me understand the whole situation. Four nights, 5 days, by himself. A little bit of milk and food, mowing and weeding. That's it. I didn't ask for a whole house deep clean, or a basement floor renovation (he did that once when we were gone, and I'm sure I cut him some slack on everything else that time).
Me: And fresh food. So that I don't have to go tomorrow.
Tim: I can go tonight.
Me: Don't you understand that since you didn't do things things while we were gone, you are making it harder for me tomorrow?
Am I wrong to be annoyed? I don't think so. And am I wrong to put it out here? I don't think so with that, either. I know if I'd have written things down, most items would have gotten done. But that irritates me because it places blame on me, and not him, and I try to make sure that everyone in this house is accountable for their actions. This way, the whole of cyberspace can keep Tim in check! (I love you, honey.)
But after all is said and done, I can admit that after the frustration of coming home to what I'd consider Tim's inconsiderate behavior, he's a good guy at heart. I'm learning from the situation, every time I think back on it. Next time, I'll write things down, as simple as they might be. Next time, he'll probably remember to at least look at the list. Next time, I'm sending him out with the kids for 4 nights and 5 days.